Why call this “My 3rd Act”

Well I see my life up until period where I was something like 29 to 31 years old as “growing up”. The 1st Act in the playscript of my life. The 2nd Act is the period from around the time I turned 30 until I moved her to Avon CT (central Connecticut) back in September of 2015.

One of the first things that happend to me when I moved to Connectict was on my 60th birthday in the summer of 2016 I was out shopping and in the supermarket I saw a Lyman Orchard’s Strawberry Ruhbarb pie and I thought back to when I was a kid growing up in Chappaqua NY how Mrs. Roberts who lived across the street from me on Cross Ridge Road in Chappaqua  NY would always bake me a Strawberry Ruhbard Pie with a Lattice Crust for my birthdays so in a moment of personal nostalgia I bought myself the pie.

I don’t recall what else I prepared for my birthday dinner that night but after eating a good glorious piece of that wonderful pie I started to have problems. 999 people out of 1000 can eat a Lyman Orchards pie without any risk at all but I am not one of those people. I am highly allergic to poison ivy and its urushiol relative cashew nuts and cashew nut oil. On the label along with the nutritional content was some text that read:

“CONTAINS WHEAT, EGG. This product is manufactured on equipment that is shared with other products containing soy, coconut, milk, peanuts and tree nuts.”

I am okay with peanuts milk wheat and soy but the “free nuts” part could put me into a hospital and it did. I ended up in ehe UConn Dempsey Hospital for a few days getting treated for waht was the worst allergic reaction I had ever had in my life. My mouth and lips started to feel numb and the next day I started to breakout in a poisen ivy like rash that began in my extremities notably my hands. Over the coming days the rash grew both in severity and the area that it covered until it got the point where it then covered about 80% of my body. They put me on a regimen of prednisone that would last for a few weeks and I almost imediatly felt the difference and began to recover.

But in the seven years since then I been plagued with other allergy outbreaks although thankfully none of them were are bad as that big one I just described and then chromic kidney disease reared its ugly head .

The 3rd Act

The “Hermit” From Down By The River at UConn John Dempsey Hospital in March 2023

Back in March of 2023 I went from Stage 4 Chronic Kidney Disease to complete Kidney Failure Stage 5 and spent most of the month in the excellent UConn John Dempsey Hospital. They set me up with a hemodialysis catheter in my chest that taps into a vien in my neck until I could get surgery for an AV fistula made by joining an artery and vein in your arm which I had done this past July.

In retrospect, while I am not a doctor, after learning all I can about Chronic Kidney Disease I think mine can be mainly attributed to two things,… a family history of high blood pressure and a my almost habitual taking of Aleve (naproxen sodium) for the aches and pains from old football injuries, ski and bicycling crashes of the last 50 years.

I would be remiss if I didn’t give credit to Davita Kidney Care and in my specific case the Dialysis Clinic in Bloomfield CT for the education and help they provide with understanding kidney diease especially with diet & nutrition.

Since having the emergency visit to UConn I can honestly say I have been feeling a little bit better every single day and can now say this is the best I have felt in the last 5 to 7 years since I moved to Avon Connecticut in September of 2015.

But I Have To Be Realistic And Say Going Forward It Is Like Staring Life All Over Again…

I have to be realistic and say going forward it is like staring life all over again. In a sense I feel like a college kid graduating and now setting out on my own. I’ve built up and acquired a ton of expertise in several areas in the infamous “School of Hard Knocks” and now it time to share and apply what I have learned.

Three days a week, Monday Wednesday, and Friday I have to get up at 5am and go in for 4 hours of kidney dialysis and I don’t get back home until 11:30 am until the day I get a transplant. While I am on 3 transplant lists the wait is on average 3-5 years at most centers. You can luck out, I just learned of and met online someone who went into kidney failure six months ago and just got their call for a transplant.

On the plus side I now have four hour sessions three days a week carved out for continuing education where I read or listen to books, online lectures, and training videos on a variety of topics.

And in just a matter of two week I redesigned, rewrote, and relaunched this JerraldHayes.com domain of mine with an emphasis on the Things I Can (still) Do even while recovering from the depths of CKD. While it may still be a while before I can get out riding my bicycle again (prior to Sept of 2015 I used to ride an average of 30+ miles a day, 24.5 miles a day during the week and longer rides on the weekends) and while working as carpenter and contractor building stairs & railing and remodeling home may be a long way off those dreams are certainly not out of the realm of possibilities anymore.

And this September I was served with a Notice To Quit which is the first step in the eviction process here in CT and I desperately need help getting my life back on a stable level footing again so I started a GoFundMe that I would appreciate you taking a look at and consider donating or share with others—any help gets me closer to my goal. 

Back in the late 1990 I read an Inc magazine article about the business legend Norm Brodsky and his life as an angel investor (A Look At Real Life Angels ) and it has always been there in my mind ever since. I see all the friends who have contributed to the GoFundMe projects surrounding me as my “angel investors” and the majority shareholding partners group in Jerrald Hayes ‘the business’  and I am confident that once I am back up and running with “The Things I Do” I will be paying them back for their confidence and investment in me and for those who don’t want their investment in me paid back I will take that money and “pay it forward” in the future to help others I find in troubled times,

And I Have A Great Dog By My Side…

Janey on the Job

I have a long history of great super dogs going back to the late 70 and 1980s in Chappaqua NY and 1990s through to September of 2015  in Katonah NY and when one of my legendary dogs the late great Roxanne passed away up here in Avon CT I lucked out when I got Janey Memphis Hayes to step into the Dog Position with help from Sarah Rosenberg of Odie’s Orchard Hill Rescue (and on FaceBook at Odie’s Orchard Hill Rescue). People who regularly drive by on Waterville Road have seen Janey hanging out on duty with me when I am shoveling snow off the driveway or mowing the front lawn.

Janey is literally my constant companion never straying from my side and she is arguably the most trainable dog I have ever had. I have told the story how back in the winter of 2020 I decided I didn’t ike Janey bolting out the door the instant I opened it so I sat her down and we had a talk about a “new rule” we were going to implement. If she wanted to go outside she needs to sit in front of the refrigerator and wait for me to say “Okay”.

It took it her about a day and a half to get this new rule down pat.

That’s a good dog. So then one night a few month later I opened the door to put some items in the recycling bin just outside the door and Janey bolted outside, down the steps and then halfway down the driveway before I called out to her and said: “Hey! I thought we talked about this! Don’t we have a NEW RULE for when I open the door?”

She then came back up the driveway and back up the steps and into the kitchen and then sat down in front of the refrigerator. And I thought NOW THAT’S A REAL GOOD DOG!

And just tonight as I was writing this I heard her downstairs in the kitchen going into the recycling and I called out “Janey, just what do you think you are doing?” and I heard her drop the empty dog food she pulled out the container and she came back upstair to sit next to me. Again, THAT’S A REAL GOOD DOG!

Janey On Guard Watch As We Sit Out Front

So,…Need Some Help?

So if you’re thinking I could use someone’s help who has a life of experience to call on you should…

Give me a call…